"WHERE YOU RELAX"

I think your life was one big relax really! Strenuous exercise or hard labour were definitely not high on your list of priorities.
But you were able to relax in many different ways.
You loved the spa. You enjoyed your own little corner of the shed with the couches and armchairs positioned just right so that you could loll all over them. You loved the computer desk where you would sit with the chair side-on to the screen so that your long legs could rest on the desk. You had a favourite seat on the couch...a bit like Sheldon?
 And, of course, your bed, where you would often sleep on your tummy with your head under the pillow.

"TOY"

As I've mentioned in previous blogs, your favourite toy as a toddler was a little pink dog which you named "Plonk the somersault Dog" or just "Plonk" for short. You decided on that name because when you threw him in the air he sometimes turned over like a somersault. Plonk went everywhere with you and you wouldn't go to bed at night without Plonk beside you.
One night disaster struck...we couldn't find Plonk anywhere!
We turned the house upside down but to no avail.
We were a little worried as Dad had picked Plonk up at a garage sale so we didn't like our chances of finding a replacement.
However, our luck held out and, lo and behold, Dad found a replica at another garage sale a few days later.
We quietly snuck him into your room but you were on to us!! You knew straight away that it was not Plonk!
It didn't seem to matter though...you adopted this replacement very easily and named him Blonk!
The photo shows you with your many, many soft toys. Plonk is the pink dog on top of the monkey's head on the left.

"FEET"

I suppose your feet were not overly large considering they had to balance out your 6'4" frame. I think you wore a size 10. But, your growing years from about the age of 13 through to about 16 or 17 were a nightmare as far as shoes went!
School shoes were never a problem! You didn't care what they looked like and, although I had a conscience when it came to your presentation at school, I could see your point! You would need new shoes in two months anyway because your feet were growing at a phenomenal rate! You really did look messy in the feet department though! I am still not sure what you did to wreck them so quickly!?
Basketball shoes, however, were a different matter!
You had to have the best...and to a certain extent I agreed as you were very prone to injury and good ankle support was vital! But when you needed new shoes every couple of months it really was expensive! AND1 were a favourite brand.
As for casual shoes your preference was for those sneaker-type things that looked like slippers for a Greek granny! I've kept a couple of those...not sure why...maybe for a laugh in years to come!!! xx

"TRASH"

Talk about stubborn!
I once asked you to clean up the 'trash' that surrounded your beanbag.
It was your habit to come home from school and park yourself in front of the TV with whatever junk food you could get your hands on. This only became a problem when the wrappers, packages, glasses, cups, plates, etc accumulated and became a magnet for ants.
After repeatedly asking you to clean it up (and being a little bit stubborn myself and refusing to do it!!) I decided on a different course of action! I got out the digital camera and took one photo of your beanbag and it's surrounds, after you had retired for the night!
I then displayed this photo on the wall near the door with the label, "Day 1".
This was repeated for the next four days with consecutive labels and with the pile of trash growing markedly each day!
Finally, on the fourth day, you noticed these photos and were able to perceive the story they were telling and understand the character portrayal that was my intent.
It worked!!!
You cleaned it up! xx

"YOUR NAME"

Up until about two weeks before you were born, you were always going to be called Jack. I'm not really sure why we changed our minds. I think that I had always liked the name Jacob but was put off giving you that moniker because of 'the cat'!
You see, when I first met your Dad he owned a very large, very egocentric cat named Jacob.
 Jacob the Cat didn't last too long after we were married though. Not only did I dislike cats intensely but he insisted on sleeping in the cots we had set up for your twin brothers, Toby and Nick, before they were even born. So, we decided , unanimously, that he had to go!
Just as well really, or you would have shared your name with a cat!!!
Your second name, Anton, came from several sources. To me, there didn't seem to be a lot that went well with Jacob but I was determined that you would have a second name as neither your father nor I had ever had one. In the end I think I sort of liked Aaron or Anton. Anton won the day as we had previously met one of Oma's brothers from The Netherlands who had the same name and we also had a good friend named Anton. Both of these lovely people now share the Heavens with you!!! (Mind you, they both enjoyed a party....I hope you're all having a ball together!!!)
As far as I can determine, the name Van Berlo originated in Belgium in a place called Berlo or maybe Berloz. There is apparently a chateau there called Chateau de Berloz which you had often talked of visiting one day.
 Maybe one of your cousins or mates might look it up one day and send us a photo!

"KEY"

We moved into the house at Maple Way just before your 17th birthday. What surprised us the most was how you liked to be treated as a grown-up but would sneak out through your bedroom window for night-time forays to McDonalds.
We would laugh at your immaturity, as we had several spare keys which would have made things so much easier for you! Really, if you were going to have these 'secret' rendezvous', why not make it easier on yourself? But this continued until Dad put a screw into the window so that it would only open a few centimetres.
Your friends have since admitted that it was the secrecy of it all which provided the excitement...as though you were escaping!
Must think we came down in the last shower!!!

"BREAKFAST"

You definitely inherited your Opa's sweet tooth when it came to food!
When you were little I was able to send you off to school with a belly full of cereal and toast and fruit juice. But what you really wanted was Fruit Loops!! So, every holidays, I would buy a big packet of Fruit Loops just for a treat!
However, once you were old enough to make your own breakfast menu, all my 'good parenting' ideas went out the window! Your favourite breakfast became toast with butter, sugar and cinnamon! I had no say in this as you went to work later than I did, so you would eat after I had left the house.
On the evening of the day you passed away I went to sit quietly in my chair in the lounge room. I already had tear-filled eyes as I tried to come to terms with a life without you in it...only to find that you had left a little reminder of 'you' in my chair! Sugar and cinnamon crumbs!
You had obviously chosen my chair as your breakfast nook that morning!

"AN ANIMAL"

After you passed away Snoop would sit by your bedroom door and cry. He just knew that he missed his 'playmate'. You were the one who would get down on the floor and 'rough' him up. You would tease him mercilessly with false punches and growls. You would toss him in the air and wrestle with him. And he loved every minute of it. He kept coming back for more and more and more!
Every time your mates come to visit us, Snoop gets very excited! He knows that someone is going to push him around and play 'properly' with him. Apparently, John and Sian and I just don't quite cut it!
Just after Christmas we decided to get another dog, thinking that maybe that was what Snoop needed. We brought Rosie the Golden Cocker Spaniel home and decided to give her a one month trial.
Snoop hated it!! I suppose he was no longer given sole attention and was being dominated by a 'bitch'!
After a month we found a lovely home for Rosie and surprisingly Snoop bounced back to his old self. He just needed to know that life is still ok!
Just goes to show...dogs are just like us!! They pine, they cry, they miss you intensely...but life has to go on! And when we stop to think about it through the tears and the longing, our lives are pretty good...they just have a great BIG missing piece!! 

"MOON"

Remember the time you rang us in the middle of the night (I think it was about 2am) and asked Dad to bring the jumper leads out to Camp Hill because you had a flat battery?
Turns out you hadn't been out there to wine and dine at 'Parnassus' restaurant. Your story was very different!
You had taken Amber for a star-gazing tour and obviously the moon wasn't quite providing enough light for you, so you had your headlights on.
Woops..too long! Flat battery!

Actually,  I'm just adding a bit more to this one!! I was just looking through some old MySpace sites and saw a picture of you and Callum J. This particular photo was taken on a fishing trip up in the bush at the back of Moe somewhere. We had stopped to pick up Callum and once we had travelled on some crappy bush tracks we reached a very beautiful spot by the river. I sat down to read, Dad began fishing and you two wandered upstream somewhere. Later, I was taking some lovely photos when I realised that there were two (or four) very cheeky 'moons' facing the camera from a log in the distance!

"THE KITCHEN SINK"

Well, dishes weren't really your thing...they're not mine either, but they have to be done!!
If you were asked to do the dishes you would usually do them...in your own sweet time! You'd agreeably say, "OK, no worries." But I think your theory was that your Dad would eventually get sick of waiting for you to do them and he would do them himself!! Or, you would wash everything except the pots and pans!
However, on the night before you died, I asked you to pack the dishwasher and nearly fell over in shock when you stacked the dishwasher, washed and dried the pots and pans AND wiped the bench!!
Seemed like things were looking up!
Wouldn't mind the odd dirty pot or grimy bench now though! xxx

"DELICIOUS"

Well you wouldn't have been able to tell from looking at you that you LOVED food! You were like a stick insect, all long and gangly.
Your favourite foods were very simple affairs. You absolutely adored 'Wattle stump' which was actually a Dutch peasant's meal consisting of potatoes, onions and carrots all boiled together and then mashed, with the addition of a Rookwurst sausage added in the final stages so that the flavours were infused through the vegetables. This became your specialty in the kitchen as well!
Your other 'delicious' food was raw cookie dough! If you were going to stay at 383 I would usually include a bought tube of "Aunty Kath's choc-chip cookie dough"...just for a treat!! You were even known to whip up a batch of cookie dough for yourself so that you could 'lick the bowl'..without any baking occurring, of course!

"BEFORE / AFTER"

There are many before and afters associated with you and your life.
There is the one which occurs almost daily now, where we refer to things in our own lives as being "before Jake died" or "after Jake died". I think it is such a tragic part of our own lives, that many things will often be remembered in that way.
Then, there is the hair! Pictures of you as a small child and in your Primary school days show a child with very short, straight, spiky hair. But the "after" shots all show you with that wild, mussed-up look which kept the hair gel companies afloat. Your baby and toddler pictures are so different from the teenage photos...Amber couldn't see any resemblance at all!!
I can even make mention of the before and after haircuts. You would come home from school and say, "You'll be pleased to know that April cut my hair for me today!" Well, thank you for those free haircuts, April...but I often couldn't tell the difference!
And, what about the 'before and after' of your basketball games? You would often head off to a game all fit and lively, only to return with a bandaged limb or a dislocated finger or something. Some seasons, you missed more games than you played. 

"FUNNY"

You were always funny and fun to be with! Your sense of humour was very similar to your cousin, Tim's as, like him, you were very quick-witted and would come out with the most random responses which would make everyone laugh. As some of your mates have told me, "The party never started 'til Jake got there!"
One of your classic responses was to respond to every question with, "Seven!" (Your dad recently bought me a teddy bear to replace the one he gave you when you were born...I have named it Seven)
It was also very hard to get a decent photo of you at times as you were always making funny faces.

"A CORNER OF OUR HOME"

You have never lived in the home we now live in, but a little corner of our home houses the material side of 'you'. The fact that your material possessions now fit into a small 'treasure' chest is testament to the type of person you were.
After you passed away we searched and searched for such possessions as the teddy bear your Dad gave you when you were born, your favourite childhood storybook (The Very Hungry Caterpillar) and the little pink dog named Plonk that you always had to have with you when you went to bed. However, these things (which we knew we had kept) were nowhere to be found. So we have to assume that you held no particular sentimental value to any of these things and threw them out in one of your regular 'clean-outs.'
You were never one to hold dear to material possessions but you treasured your mates and your girlfriend and your family. I think this says a lot  about the sort of person you were and is why you are missed so very much!
Your 'treasured' possessions might be housed in a little corner of our new home but you are everywhere in it. We feel your smile in every ray of sunshine and you are with us in everything we do! <3

"A SIGN"

Again, I thought this one would be tricky but it's not!
I remember many driving trips in the car when you would just leave me flabbergasted with the things your clever little mind could do! Before you even started school we would be driving along and you would read all the signs to us along the way! It was one of the first indications for us that we were dealing with someone extraordinary!
Other times, at the age of only 3 or 4, you would say, "Mum, could you tell me when we have gone one kilometre?"
After one kilometre you would then say something like, "I counted 8 trees, so if we go ten kilometres there will be 80 trees!"
How does a mind so young even deal with those sort of concepts?
In later years, your job at the The Gazette saw you being given carte blanche to design the banners/signs for the sports pages and other specialty pages.
So you see, the topic became quite relevant in relation to you!
Sometimes, even now, I imagine little signs that you are with me...a rainbow, a star or just a warm feeling around me!
I love your signs! ♥

"FORK"

Strange topic today (topics are taken from Photo a Day) but it still recalls a memory.
Your Dad has a lot to answer to for this one! You always ate with your fork in your right hand and your knife in your left hand even though you were right-handed. Both your Dad and Sian are the same so if I ever asked any of you to set the table I would have to go around and change all the cutlery back to the way it should have been.
It's taken me all this time, but I just realised that your hidden agenda was that I would often just do it myself in the first place to save having to redo it! Little bugger!!

"SOMEONE YOU TALKED TO TODAY"

I talk to you every day really Jake, even if it's just in my thoughts. But this time ten months ago I had had my last conversation with you just a few hours previously.
You talked to me for a long time that night after Dad and Sian had gone to bed. You told me how you were worried about your gambling and not sure how you would cope with payday the next day. But, you were confident that you would get through it and reassured me that you didn't need me to stay home from work to help you get through the day!
You talked about Amber and how great she was! You talked about confiding in just a few close mates but I'm still not sure how many of them actually knew what you were going through.
I'm proud of who you were, Jake...and especially proud that our children were able to talk to us at any time about their innermost feelings! Not every parent has that level of intimacy with their children, especially during those teenage years.
I'll keep 'talking' to you, Jake...this is just another way to do it! ♥

"GREEN"

Easy one this time!!
The word 'green' immediately brought to mind your school sporting life.
At Primary School you were in Correa House (green team) and went on to become the school captain of Correa. I still remember your ear-to-ear grin the on the day the announcements were made! You were so chuffed and just couldn't wipe the smile off your face all day! (even though your wrist was all bandaged up...can't remember why but it was a common occurrence!)
Then, you went to Marist Sion college for your secondary school years and ended up in MacKillop House (also green).
You loved your sport and were very good at anything you put your mind to! You played basketball from the age of 8 and grew to a lanky 6'4" so it was a very apt sport. You usually played for Rebels who always wore green! Your forte was your goal-shooting ability which was well aided by your height and by your ability to gain great heights from a standing jump.
Go Green!!!

"SUNGLASSES"

You always looked great in your sunnies!! Well, you were a good looking guy all 'round really!

 These orange sunglasses belong to your cousin, Beck! we all had turns of wearing them on the day we celebrated Julie's 5oth. A fun day!!

 Most of your sunglasses were cheapies and had white frames until you recently discovered eBay and bought a pair of more expensive ones (I can't remember the brand) at a cheaper-than-usual price. I think your sunnies were as important to you as your wallet and keys as you never left the house without them!!

"CAR"

We bought your first car for you about four or five weeks before you got your licence. It was an old Commodore VS but it was in reasonable condition.
I think that having a car was like a 'red rag to a bull' with you though because, three weeks before you even got your licence, you decided to drive up to Marist Sion to say hello to your mates.
What you often forgot was that a lot of people knew us and also knew you!
Sian came home and saw that your car was missing so she immediately thought it had been stolen. After texting Dad and I to see if we knew where it was, she decided that perhaps YOU had the car!
How right she was!!
Several people saw you and reported back to us!! Sometimes you were not so bright for a 'clever clogs'!
Your next car was also a Commodore but it was a newer model. You took out a loan for this car and religiously made repayments right up until the day you died! This car remained cleaner than the old one...you obviously loved it!! I remember you and Amber polishing it one evening. It got so dark that you couldn't see what you were doing and ended up with streaks all over it the next day.
Like me, you loved driving more than you loved cars!! You would drive just for the sake of driving and finding 'new' places. Often on these jaunts you would be accompanied by your mates.
Good times and great fun!!

"CLOUDS"

All I can think of is walking into the bathroom after you had been in there and nearly suffocating in clouds of deodorant!!
At one stage you were using so much of the spray-on stuff that I actually queried whether you could get high on it!
Oh well, at least I kept you amused with my naivety!
And... you probably kept the deodorant company in business! I wonder if they have declared bankruptcy yet?